kid

I remember when I was younger I’d look up to the kids a few grades above me and think they were so cool.  They were seniors in high school.  And for those I met who were in college–wow, that’s only where I go when I’m smart.

And then a strange thing kept happening—I’d keep growing up.

Every time I got to the stage that I once looked up to, I realized I didn’t feel drastically different than I did before, or that I now knew it all.

And I’d think, I’m in high school now, why doesn’t this feel all that cool?  I’m in college now, aren’t I supposed to know exactly what I want to do with my life?

Instead of feeling cool or smart, I just felt like a big kid.

I’d always feel like I’d know more at the next stage, or when I’m at a certain point of my life, or when I’ve accomplished a certain something.  As if once I reach a certain age, things were just going to fall into place and things would magically make sense.

Yet in every stage, I’ve realized there’s always going to be something new to figure out, something new that’ll take us right back to that childhood learning mentality.

Like when we’re done with school, and we must learn about what it means to apply what we’ve studied in our work lives…and learn about all the dedication, persistence, and hard work it takes.

Or when we get married, and we must learn what it means to be a spouse or a parent…and all the commitment, responsibilities, and sacrifice that comes with it.

And then things happen in our lives—things that force us to learn.

Like when we lose someone, and we must figure out how to mend that hole…and figure out how to move on.

Or like when we find someone, and we must figure out how to let someone in…and figure out how to let our guards down.

There is always a new step in life that will shake us up again, making us feel maybe a little insecure, maybe a little scared—taking us right take back to feeling like a kid all over again, just trying to figure it all out.

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